i see ya...

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

im just a human

with simple needs

and desires that

form my mind with ease

i play chess games

list past dames that failed to lift me higher, and you the one to blame

i question the magic,

that you posses whether its empty sprinkles

or a flat chest

either way im stayin

cuz you the one for me

thats another plan formed so easily

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

i know its scary

but listen baby,

i kno my plans are hazy

but you should be my lady

she got this walk that

i just cant explain

it sends chillls up my back

through my membrain

i cant escape this girl

she's been implanted

so i clean up my stance

try to hide the frantic-

ness that i need to confess when

when you come near

just listen here

i think its a about time

you realize

that im not a simple girl

with no hopes or desires

i plan to get lifted

with room for an extra

so if you're ever so kind

we should weatha the weatha

step back for a second

and take it all in

can't you invision is this mess we're in?

were you're not here with me

for eternity

and its only cuz

you say its not meant to be

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

lets change your thinking

understand my philosphy

cuz if you only knew what you do to me

then it would come so easily

then it would come so, so easily

check it, i got a new plan

so peep this blueprint

i got this ring that

you hand could fit

its not the world

just a little something

call it a practice ring

till we get it bumpin

cuz when the times comes to flaunt your jewel

the whole world will know that its you that rules

the entire stratosphere

but if ya not here

theres nothing more i fear

cuz i was made for you

and you for me my dear

i think its a about time

you realize

im not a simple girl, that lets time fly bye

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

i see ya lookin you see me starin i start to wonder then i start the swearin

cuz if you only knew what you do to me then you would come so, so easily

i just wanna be happy

- snap out that mushy shit.

i like to be this way for the hell of it

- but moments like that are holdin u back man

i can't, i can't help it

- snap out of the zombie like state

well shit, thats easy for you to say

- well hey, im not the one crying today

im breaking inside and its all my fault

- no not entirely, you're just lost in thought

so what am i suppose to do?

- stop talking to yourself and just move

so should i expect no response after this statement here?

70

im at a lost for words and a lost for feelings because this very moment you're the reason why, why i just cant hold it together. i see you with, her, and her, and her over there. and i think to myself this is less than fair.

what do i lack that forces your eyes to glance over mine?

what dont i posses that forces your hand not into mine?

what do i have to do to change this picture and make you mine?

i guess maybe it's meant to be, in another light.

what hurts the most is that you'll never know.

even upon reading this note it'll never show.

because it passes over your head so effortlessly

so its obvious im one that hurts. Not you, but me

i hate how i feel

how i know its not real

cuz if the feelings were reciprocated

then we could seal the deal

the rhyming was easy but seeing you with her isnt

i go to bed every night dreamin of what im missin

so if i dare sneak a kiss in and act a tad belligerent,

then pull me aside and beg me to act different.

because the tug and tull felt so good

i ask for more knowing i should(nt)

but if its heaven sent then id know, right?

alls well that ends well so this time i'll try with all my might

this might not be my last hint to you

but if you stare a second too long at me,

i'll at least think you knew

maybe

maybe in time well see

that whats meant to be will be

que sera sera as it may

thats what it seems to me

a game of time and i've just about lost

to which hand must i deal and to what cost

should i fold and sit out or bluff and risk

maybe throw up my hands n walk away in total shock

yeah, maybe that'll be the day

yeah, maybe that'll be the way

to end this cycle of pain

yeah, maybe that'll be the way.

when its all said and done, when care is of no matter

i'll probably shout from mountain tops "shit will never get better!"

but i know my soul. i cant give up like that.

but when you walk away empty handed time after time what else do you get?

im just about at the end of my ropes with all of this

maybe i'll just forget it never happened yeah, cuz ignorance is bliss

i'll fell better again and can move on

but then you'll appear again

then i'll give in

but hopefully i pass you up.

and say thats enough because maybe, just maybe....

yeah, maybe that'll be the day

yeah, maybe that'll be the way

to end this cycle of pain

yeah, maybe that'll be the way.

its a mystery where this road will take me

so for now i pray the lord wont forsake thee

but such a silly fool i am to think that maybe

maybe this girl could be my one and only

yeah, maybe

just maybe

strange not yet beautiful

its been a while since ive seen your face

never have i forgotten such a place

where id place my lips upon those of yours

its beginning to become an eye sore of sorts

im not sure if its the distance within the stars

or the lack of substance when we know who we are.

as one separate being we seem to be keen.

but together as one is something ive yet to believe

i gave little so little i get in return

dont worry i'll be fine

in time these surface wounds fade

into another night & day

revelations have never been so apparent as this moment this second

when i stare into your eyes and come up missin.

every spark and gleam of what i thought would be

the desire in your face is absent but yet, thats ok w/ me.

i gave little so little i get in return

dont worry i'll be fine

in time these surface wounds fade

into another night & day

just say how you feel

just say how feel. never hurt anybody, right?

minus the barer of bad news if all fails to take flight.

seeing as im the exposer of the most vulnerable components i posses

i suggest you let me handle myself accordingly if i fail to, address all the tingling thoughts that have fluttered into my mind, because i, have run out of time to say that line that goes "well, i mean, i dont know. its just how i feel. im able to accept things that seem far too real and believe me i was far too off to even think of the thought of being with you.

*************************************************

i give in. i can only put up the tough act for so long and the second you say you're ready, then im on, on and up for anything again. i live for the second you accept me as your one and only and i cant say i sleep lonley like cuz just the other night i dreamnt of you and i taking flight. i lived in the leaps and bounds n found that in this dream, the only thing you thought of was me. im a desperate fool to count the second in which the day passes till i relive my fairytale of life when the night lights bright up the sky and my comfortable songs and lullabies are the only true things to seize time as i lay idle by the wayside and wait. for you. to appear. there. over there in the field of dreams and i have these scenes that reemerge on a daily, more like nightly, and its kinda frightening how i depend on these dreams. its clockwork of the unwanted kind i imagine. it has been ever since way back when, when, i fail to even recall the moment you said we never had anything at all. was it my fault? did i say something? didnt i say something? my only option is running for that something that, we never had at all.

so i guess it is my fault. i extend my deepest apologies and send these tears to your front door and will there be more? possibly. because honestly, its hard for me to believe that there was a hint of sincerity when you said you didnt wanna hurt me. so if all i have all these dreams, these scene that reemerge on a daily , more like nightly, and yeah, it is kinda frightening but that just might be the thing that gets me to say silly silly me. it is not I who lives with pain of giving in, it is you who lives with the misery of what could have been.

if i stayed over..

let me tell you, im not the kind to stand in line

so check the equation for a lapse in time

if i stayed over, then its on for good

yeah, cuz when im gone im gone for good.

we had this chance to commence in a dance

so why waste the moment with lack of plans

just let me stay over, then its on for good.

cuz when im gone, im gone for good.

if i can transform this moment only to make it last

i can breath in the future and breath out the past

so if i stayed over, then its on for good.

cuz when im gone, im gone for good.

try not to cry when the dust settles beneath my feet

just arise from your knees and accept defeat

if i had stayed over, it would have been on for good

but you let me leave like i knew you would.

pack up the pain and seal it with hurt

sooner or later this will be a lesson learnt

but im gone now, gone for good

so carry on your way like i know you should.

naked as we came

naked as we came
clothed as we go
will you leave me tonight?
my heart wants to know
so warm the start so cold the end
so pleasant the pleasure too absent to mend
so i drift away like a leaf in a pond
hoping you'll return
since been too long
say yes to the thought of possibilities
if this is really gonna be
then it should start with me
i've yearned for centuries
that you would be more than a silhouette
i hope for too much but yet..
i still dream to see you again
naked as we came
clothed as we go
will you leave me tonight?
please say no.

just i.

i say things spur of the moment to muzzle the true thought im tempted to reveal.

if i could heal these cracks of confusion then i could calmly explain why your more than just an ideation. i picture much more for you and i but the problem lies in the reciprocation of these feelings. i feel that there may be a break in communication and this has my heart bracing for the arrival of hitting the pavement.

i swear im not a dreamer just a future schemer. i'd like to think of myself as ahead of the game in laymans terms. moments come and go but this love of mine will be around till the end of the road so hop on board if you're ready for the ride because soon we can be lovers as cheesy as this sounds side by side.

im a dork. yes this is true.

instead of roses i burn a cd for you.

im silly. yes

i jumble my words in attempts to say i like you

im all yours. when the time is near

if you give me the chance and breakdown the fear.

they said her beauty was incomparable & i thought her presence was insurmontable.

they said she'd go far with those looks & i fancied her love of knowledge & books

they say gals fancy the elite type and i myself just aint right so maybe i should just take flight and try it again with all my might another season because she might not belive in.. everything i have for the givin. but. shut up.

they told me i had no shot and then i just thought, was your chance blew to the wind? so here in lies the defeat in your eyes to mask the hope and lust for hate and trust me when i tell you that im not the one to let go and fall for a bust.

i'll awake a winner, true still a sinner, but to the eyes of perfectionists whose eyes may appear off kilter i go the sane and maintain my victory and only the lonely die slowly.

I myself will speed past the naysayers and arise on top of the crop with my girl in toe and bestow upon you fools the rules of the land because here stands her queen and herself the man.

what else

as i awaken these thoughts in mind that have bee asleep for some time, i, come to the conclusion that all this pitter patter across the floor for some eye sore of a feelin is maybe all an illusion. no need to scamper across the pavement for ways of savin face just embrace the moment you embarked and when the moment has dawned on you.. you'll know.

that all this struggling with yourself can only get you so far..off the path thats meant to be marked with you name as the winning flag and then at last you can do that dance you waited on for so long, i saw your face. the happiness you misplaced along with the grace just to save face was all it took for you end up in last place.

you see im just nothing but shortcomings and sometimes im something partially long lasting but the last thing i remember is her, voice. telling me i had a choice either to give in and give my all or stand stubborn and wait for the fall. i knew i could have it all but.. maybe its those shortcomings and odd sayings that have me praying to this all knowing image n this just in.

im done.

wake up.

we walk past the half dead only to tread hate throught the water of dead fathers that spread sin. we live by the dollar only to hollar out hate and discrimination is the basis for this broken nation. lift each other up and come from another for we all are apart of another brother.

what comes from above is the spirit that bleeds through these cracked walls and sticks to the floors for us to walk upon. soak up the blessings and spew it out no doubt we have the power in the final hour to overcome much more than an eye soar but if you see this fight as a bore than theres nothing left for the man who cant take it anymore.

sell out your soul and leave it to be stomped out, hallowed out chocked out and spat out like last years news and don't go singing the blues when those who you thought loved you fail to bring the loot. becasue shoot...

its every man for himself but if we've learned anything from past civil wars we see that to have been dealt with left this blessed nation a mess its just not how things work. to leave one man alone on the plank to think is selfish. become selfless and do less for yourself and help ya fellow man.

im one alone but together we are strong. together we can overcome. she can sing chants all day long but not a single song should be sung till the war is won. work is meant to be done to make sure every mouth is feed no souls left dead and so lets tread through the muddy waters and awaken the four fathers and spit truth of the comings and happening of things we've seen. enlighten them on mistakes made but progress being paid.